It’s Always Been This Way

It’s Always Been This Way

In my longest-running sales role, I worked for a company that had the world’s largest database of consumer purchase history. So I had access, at my fingertips, to billions of pieces of data. As I was preparing presentations that I would deliver to my client, it was my responsibility to distill all of that data, all of those insights, and determine what I would put into this presentation.

Well, now in my role as I’m consulting and working with organizations, I work with scientists a lot – and scientists have access to probably just as much data and information that I did. And these scientists are responsible for presenting data, whether that’s internally or externally, but they present this information, these metrics, this science, to their audience. And we’ve been finding that there is this kind of resistance, if you will, to how the data, the insights, are shared with the audience.

In one particular situation, I found that the group was really resistant to the training and the coaching that I was offering on how or in what way to distill the data, and then how would that be shared out. And they were resistant simply because it’s not the way it’s always been done. They had a particular way that, throughout the organization, data had been shared. But what was interesting is there didn’t seem to be any hard and faster rules; there wasn’t the CEO or President coming down and saying, “This IS the way it has to be done.”

It was just habit.

Every single scientist, they had fallen into the same exact kind of template or form that their predecessors had, even though it was not working. So take a look at how you’re presenting information, or quite frankly, going about anything in your day-to-day job. Is there a better way to do it, that maybe you believe is the way it’s supposed to be done, but there’s really no rule to it?

Challenge yourself. Get out there and find creative, unique new ways that could essentially make you better at what you do, even though it may not be traditionally how it’s always been done!

Easy vs. Effective Communication

Easy vs. Effective Communication

“Colleen, I know what you’re saying is true, but it’s just so much easier to not do that.”

This is what a C-suite executive was saying to me as I was there on-site with him and his leadership team. I was there to train and coach on communication, and he simply shared as I was going through the strategies and the coaching and he said, “Yeah, I get that, but it’s just so much easier for me in that moment when I’m having that dialogue, that communication with a direct report or another employee in the organization, it’s just easier to say what’s top of mind. It’s easier to just tell them what I’m thinking, what I’m feeling.”

And I looked at him and said, “Well, how’s that working out for you?” Not how he wanted to. So yes, while I recognize it’s easier in the moment to say and blurt out in a reactionary way what we’re thinking or what we’re feeling, it is not easier on the other side of it. I was sharing a story on a recent video here about one of the account executives that I managed years ago in another lifetime, and how she was banging away at her keyboard, typing this angry email in response to an angry email from a client.

Through coaching, I was trying to get her to change this, because in the moment it was easier for her to get those emotions out. But if she had sent that email, all of the other crap we would’ve had to deal with, all of the things we would’ve had to make correct on the other end with this client would’ve been much harder, much more difficult, versus taking that moment. And on that particular video, somebody commented and said, yeah, but how do you stay kind of calm, cool, and collected, right?

If you’re sitting there in some sort of communication where you have this reaction, whether it is anger, frustration, sadness, anxiety, fear, how do you manage that? And the one simple tool or strategy to give you is that we’ve got to think about what the goal is on the other side.

What is the ultimate goal?

And if your reaction is not going to get you to that goal, then you need to rethink – instead of having the reaction – what that intentional response is going to be. So, I offer for you that as you may be struggling or wanting to say, “Well, this is how I am. I am going to tell you how I feel,” I’m just going to ask, how’s that working out for you? Because while it may be easy in the moment, it is certainly not easy on the other side. Comment below, I’d love to hear from you. I’m here to unlock your x factor and to elevate your communication and your impact!

Leaders Don’t Ask Leading Questions

Leaders Don’t Ask Leading Questions

There’s a podcast that I love listening to, it’s called SmartLess. You may have heard of it, and if not, by all means go check it out! Just be warned, it has adult content in it. But it’s hosted by three celebrities: Will Arnett, Jason Bateman, and Sean Hayes; and I love the format. So one of the celebrity hosts is in charge of getting the guest for that week, the other two have no idea who the guest is going to be – until they show up on the video, in the live interview.

And true to podcast interview form, they’re asking questions throughout. Well, one of the celebrity hosts has a particular way of asking questions – and he’ll remain nameless, but if you listen to it, I’m sure you’ll figure it out pretty quickly. He asks really insightful, amazing questions that I can’t wait to hear the guest’s response to. But this host, after he asks the question, he provides examples. Now, these examples are not necessarily how we might think of a traditional leading question, right?

You may have found yourself in a similar situation, where someone’s asked you a question and they want you to answer in a particular way. I had a boss who used to do this. He would ask the question and then he would keep answering or giving these examples or asking in a way that was just trying to get me to answer how he wanted to hear the answer.

This is not what this host is doing, this is not what I’m talking about. Instead, this host, as they’re asking this question, I believe has already thought of how they themselves would answer the question based upon their own experiences, their own thoughts, their own feelings. No ill intent by any means, but then after he asks the question, he says like, is it this, or maybe it’s this? All based on the interviewer, the question asker’s experience.

What’s the risk here?

We see this happen in organizations, in households, everywhere when we’re in communication. But especially I see it with leaders when they’re speaking to their direct reports, where they know they need to ask questions, but they insert examples after they’ve asked the questions, and those examples are primarily based on their own experiences. The risk here is that the person being asked the question, in this case, a direct report, is now thinking about these examples.

Maybe they just say, “Well my manager said this and so I’m going to answer this way,” or those examples kind of shut off their own thoughts around why this happened. So as we think about asking those questions, be aware. Be aware of that intent, where even though the intent is good, you may be unintentionally leading someone down a path as you provide your own examples after the fact!

The One Thing Holding You Back

The One Thing Holding You Back

Whether you’re seeking a new job or you’re vying for that next promotion, there is one skill that you absolutely need to become not just efficient at, but really effective at. It’s the one skill I have been telling my kids since they were little that they need to become superstars at.

It’s going to be the skill that would set them apart no matter what industry, no matter what profession they went into. And with the continued advancement with technology and AI, this is the skill that will set you apart from those other job seekers, those others looking for the promotion at your organization.

What is it? Communication.

On the flip side, about 20% of people in general, and then 50% of the younger generations, those ages 18 to 35, have shared that they’ve lost out on an opportunity because of poor communication. Whether it’s because their skillset wasn’t high enough, or they had miscommunication. Nearly 50% of our younger generations are not embracing the soft skill of communication, and they’re losing out on opportunities.

When we look at job descriptions, about 28% of them have it as a skill, being highly effective in communication. So I challenge you, as you might be thinking, “I don’t really need to be a public speaker, I don’t necessarily need to present, my communication via the written word is pretty on par,” I’m going to challenge you. Look, if you want to stay where you’re at, great, go right ahead and just lean into some of the other technological hard skills, and you’ll be fine.

But if you are truly looking to accelerate where you’re at professionally, you must improve your communication skills. It is something that we can always get better at. Again, whether that’s the written word or how we verbalize it, or just even how we approach it.

Communication. So I encourage you – that’s what I do over here, unlocking that X factor to elevate communication and performance in individuals. Comment below, I’d love to share more with you as you look to accelerate your professional journey!

When You Shouldn’t Email

When You Shouldn’t Email

Not only was I completely overwhelmed, but I just shut down. I mean, completely shut down. And it was all based on how an email looked in my inbox – not even reading any of the words. It was just the sheer amount of content, the sheer amount of words that were in this email that caused me to shut down and just want to hit delete immediately.

But I couldn’t; it was an email forwarded to me from one of my private coaching clients that she had received from one of her direct reports, and I was coaching her on the next steps from this email. Now, I have nothing to do with this direct report or company, but me, again, without even reading it, I just wanted to get rid of this email as quickly as possible.

It was so overwhelming. And while email is an amazing communication tool, it’s great for record keeping, there’s so many advantages, right? But when should we not email? When should we instead pick up the phone, make a quick call, or schedule a meeting? Well, the general rule of thumb is if you are crafting an email where you need three or more pieces of information to be sent out and feedback received, or there might be some back and forth – three or more items, that warrants a call or scheduling a meeting, it should not be via email.

Your intent, when you’re sending an email to another person asking for feedback, you want them to do something. If your email looks so overwhelming that it causes the recipient to just shut down like I did, you’re never going to get anywhere. You’re never going to achieve what you want to achieve.

So instead, pick up the phone. Now for you leaders, this is an amazing coaching opportunity for your direct reports. Especially when we’re thinking about this new generation that’s entered the workforce, where they’ve relied almost solely on technology. Many of them are scared to just pick up the phone. So use this rule of three as a great coaching opportunity, so we can keep the lines of communication open and you can get what you want on the other side.