The year of my 40th birthday, actually the very month of my 40th birthday, I found myself in a complete and total funk. Ironically, that month, the month of October, I happened to be covering for one of my team members who was on maternity leave, and the client I was covering happened to be a client that I had had years prior. So I found myself psychologically and mentally feeling like I had gone backwards in life.
And here as I’m turning 40, I had these expectations of goals and achievements, and I just found myself feeling like I was backwards and I got stuck. It was so bad for those 31 days that I found myself on a Friday afternoon working from home, just completely losing it; hysterically, loudly crying. So loud that my husband, Matt, could hear me on the other side of the house, upstairs. He came rushing down just to make sure I wasn’t physically injured.
But it all culminated the night of Halloween, 31 days later. Everything hit the fan, and I woke up the next morning saying, “All right, enough’s enough. You’ve got to get out of this funk.”
And so I want to share with you my top tips of getting out of your funk, because I know that you’re either in a funk right now, or you have been, or you will be in the future. Because we all go through these different times.
Over the course of the next three videos, I’m going to give you two tips each week because you shouldn’t try do everything all at once. So I want to give you two tips that you can start implementing this week, and then you’re going to build on it each week. Alright, so let’s do it.
TIP #1: SOCIAL CONNECTION
Social connection does not mean you have to be physically next to somebody. It can be done virtually, over phone calls, over text.
We have a psychological need to connect with people. In fact, we have a biological need.
When we connect with other people, we release oxytocin. Oxytocin contributes to our happiness, our uplifting levels.
The irony is that every time I felt in a major funk, I did the opposite. I would retreat; I wouldn’t reach out to my friends or family. I was so embarrassed to share with them how I was feeling, embarrassed of the reasons why I was feeling in that funk, that I wasn’t at the top of my game. When in fact, I needed to do the opposite. And as soon as I re-engaged, as soon as I had that social connection, that happiness, that energy started to come back.
Who can you reach out to today that’s going to give you that connected feeling? Somebody who has maybe been there with you, that you can relate to, and start to have a positive conversation, just get that connection going.
TIP #2: SOMETHING TO LOOK FORWARD TO
Identify what you can look forward to because this state that you’re in, it will eventually go away. You will get past whatever it is that’s happening right now; it will come to an end.
So what is it that you could be looking forward to in the future? Something that you could plan, whether that is an experience, an event, something you’re doing, buying, going to experience, whatever that is. What could you be looking forward to?
Another practice is to wake up in the morning and think about what you can look forward to that day.
So the practice could be daily outlook and/or something you’re planning in the future. But the more you’re looking forward to something, it will carry your positive energy throughout the day.
YOUR HOMEWORK
Reach out and make a social connection.
Think about something you can look forward to.
Make a comment below, let me know what is it that you’re looking forward to? Who are you going to reach out to?