You may have that one person in your life that is constantly delivering negativity at you, almost like it’s daggers. Or you’re anticipating an upcoming event, where the feeling is going to be really dark and heavy. Or maybe just even yesterday, you had something happen where it killed your positive vibes. Whatever the circumstances are, I want to help you check that negativity so that you can move forward!

In my process, the first stage is all about awareness – and the very beginning of it is awareness on your part. So regardless of the event, the negativity that’s coming at you, you get to choose how you feel next. I know it’s way easier to blame the person, the situation, but take hold of the power that you have to determine how you are going to feel. Don’t let that other person or event control you; take that empowerment of choice and decide how you feel next.

Once you’ve got that awareness, the next awareness is knowing that the situation probably has nothing to do with you.

I know you’ve heard that before, but are you living that? Are you recognizing that the other person may just be having a bad day, that you happen to be in their path, their line of fire, on the receiving end of the negativity? The final stage of awareness – and this one is going to challenge you, and I want you to take on the challenge – is to have empathy for that other person. We have no idea how they learned to deal with negativity. They may be doing the best that they possibly can with the resources they have.

So let’s just have some empathy for them and recognize they’re doing their best. Once you’ve got that awareness, the next phase is to get into action. And immediately, I want you to build a surround sound of positivity. There are lots of different ways to do this, and it looks different for everyone, but I’m going to give you a few of my favorites. Go outside; biologically, being outside in the fresh air and the sunshine kicks in those endorphins and immediately allows you to feel that optimism, that moving forward feeling.

If you can’t get outside, listen or read something that’s positive, whether that’s an affirmation, a podcast, but just building in those positive words, it will physiologically change how you’re feeling. And finally, do you have a positive person you can reach out to? Someone you can go talk to. But my warning label is, it’s not to go talk to them to complain or bitch about the situation. It’s your Yoda; that person that as soon as you hear or see them, you’re automatically feeling that better energy.

Now, if you have someone that is in your life causing this negativity around you, if you can, eliminate them immediately. But for those people that you can’t, maybe it’s a family member or a co-worker you have to be with, start limiting the amount of time that you spend with them. Try to isolate yourself and only be with them on an as-needed basis.

And I want to leave you with, if these steps, these strategies, this process doesn’t work for you, please do not stop here. There are so many resources out there. I had an ongoing situation with a boss of mine where every single day, I had the daggers of negativity coming at me. And these steps helped me on most days, but there were days that were really rough. And instead of me getting sucked into that negativity, I chose to reach out to another resource, get new ideas.

I’m encouraging you to do the same; check the negativity and keep moving forward.